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Friday, 5 December 2014


When I was younger, I used to go shopping in stores and stare at all the things I couldn't buy, putting them in an imaginary cart, pretending I'd buy them for myself. Although I didn't then know it - after all, I was only nine - but this was the first case of clothing envy I'd ever experienced. Not, however, the last. Not by a long shot. So, without further ado, I'd like to present the top five* ladies that make me think, "FUCK, I wish I had that whole outfit."

Madison Montgomery in AHS: Coven
I'm seriously envious of the ease with which she wears things that would look 150% ridiculous on me. Although I have long considered faux-fur vests and coats to be the ephemeral sign of the sorority girl trying to stay warm and stylish while still wearing leggings (not that I have anything against leggings; I just know they aren't a fashion STATEMENT, but more like pajamas that you can wear to class), Madison Montgomery pulls it off in a way that makes it look almost appealing. When I see faux-fur I think, "Do I want that?" The answer is still no, but I actually have to think about it because I start to believe maybe it could look that good on me too. In addition, I've never seen anyone look like a bad bitch while walking in a hospital, and I have certainly rethought my intentions to buy a cossack hat after seeing it.

2. KATHRYN MERTEUIL (Cruel Intentions)

Kathryn Merteuil in Cruel Intentions
I have often repeated the following litmus test to myself as I buy clothes: Would Kathryn buy it? With lingerie-inspired pieces and a black wardrobe and accessories to match her "can't-help-but-love-it" darkly bitchy attitude, she has a reason to be high on the list. If I could have her as some kind of shopping advisor, I'd take that offer. After all, what's not to like about a girl so snarky and who gives so few fucks that she conceals her dark secrets under her holier-than-thou attitude in the most ironic way: cocaine in a cross. Although I don't condone hiding cocaine in any kind of jewelry, she receives some respect for having the balls to do something so outrageous.

3. ALI MICHAEL (Model)

One of my favorite outfits from Ali's Instagram
Ali's street style is so old-school that it feels new amongst all the more standard model street style basics of clean, fresh lines. Her style harkens back more to the 90s. It's not just her clothing that lands her on this list - although I have to admit, she has worn some of my favorite outfits of late. It's also her cool-girl vibe, which is constantly on display on her Instagram. From head to toe, she nails the model-off-duty look in a unique way. Also, she basically wears frickin' dog collars around her neck, which is too cool.

4. JOANNA KUCHTA (Instagram/Tumblr)

from Joanna's Instagram
Besides the fact that she never seems to have a bad hair day, I'm constantly obsessing over her graphic tees and stuff. I don't even have to ask myself whether I want a Sailor Moon halter. The answer is pretty obvious (YES!!!!!!!). Also, she loves tennis skirts, and I love tennis skirts (although I have yet to buy an AA original because I am on the cheapo collegiate budget, so I satisfy myself with skirts reminiscent of the style). I have to give props there to someone who channels the ~schoolgirl vibe with ease. She also wears chokers ALL the time (I am in love with chokers). And she wears big glasses and cat ears sometimes, which makes me feel better, because I have big glasses and cat ears.


Serena in a denim jacket and pleated skirt in Sailor Moon
I have no problem admitting that I still like Sailor Moon to this day. She has long, flowing hair and wears cute skirts and tops - and a schoolgirl uniform. On her days off from saving the world and crying about it, she wears comfy top/skirt combos that always look adorable. Plus, bonus for the moon-themed accessories. I will admit I recently bought a headband from NastyGal just for the moon-shaped piece on top. I still dream of the day that I'll learn I'm really a Sailor Scout or something. I want to someday create a more stylish version of Sailor Moon's outfit and wear it every day of my life.

*Honorable mentions go to Buffy, Audrey Horne, Taylor Swift in her "Blank Space" video, and Marzia Bisognin.

UP NEXT: Watch this space for a haul post (or maybe a video, if anyone's interested) from Black Friday (where I shopped in my pajamas exclusively and ordered things to arrive on the last day of finals), a playlist, and a week of outfit posts where I try and channel the five great gals I just finished talking about.

1 comment:

  1. Nice post!